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How to go on a Writing Retreat and not lose your mind. 1. Low expectations. Non-writers might imagine some sort of serene and meditative experience that produces at least hundreds of pages if not a book. Writers will expect multiple games of Words With Friends, an endless layering of bad feelings: guilt, shame, fear, boredom, panic, anger, regret. Repeat. Writers know that no matter the beauty of your setting-mountains, ocean, lakes-you will feel trapped, sad and grow to loathe the landscape. 2. An escape plan. Do not isolate yourself (Remember The Shining ). Do not welcome being completely "off the grid" (see Words with Friends, above). Do not underestimate your need to read about your neighbour's friend's sister's breakfast. Also, you need to Google-Writer's Retreat-Want to die.  3. Don't cleanse. No to the Whole 30, veganism, going off sugar, coffee or anything like that. Don't drink because you'll get morbid and possibly violent (Se

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